by Kelli-Rae Francis | Writing Prompt | November 20, 2023
Everyone has some past memories that haunt them. Whether it was a moment of embarrassment or a time they experienced something very traumatic. They would do anything to escape it.
I understand that feeling. Trust me, I’ve had my fair share of trauma.
Thanks to something called “Dissociative Amnesia”, some people are free from the burden of carrying around their past traumatic experiences.
As someone who exhibits symptoms of Dissociative Amnesia, I believe that this phenomenon is a lifesaver.
Here’s a little backstory:
Over the last couple of years, my mom and I have gotten very close. We bond over watching movies and reality shows together. Sometimes we talk and act like each others’ best friends. Our mother daughter relationship couldn’t be any stronger.
However, when I was younger we would butt heads a lot. Us fighting became so normal that when we were on good terms, it felt like the world had been flipped upside down. Throughout our arguments we said some very hurtful things to one another. Things that most relationships cannot recover from.
Thankfully, today, we both have no detailed recollection of any of our arguments. No memory of the hurtful words that were exchanged or the intensity of our fights.
I believe that forgetting gave us a second chance at rebuilding what was broken. It gave us a fresh start.
It is in our nature as humans to keep track of how others have wronged us. That’s why the following saying is so popular.
“Forgive but NEVER forget!”
Sometimes when we are wronged, even though we think we have forgiven the person who wronged us, the truth is……… We Haven’t! The next time we get hurt by the individual, our minds replay the past experiences, which can cause us to experience the pain all over again. Additionally,
Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.
-Nelson mandela
It can be similar to shackles holding us back from happiness and true inner peace.
In situations like these, having Amnesia can be a blessing in disguise. No more archives of all the times someone wronged us! We can finally be freed from the shackles of trauma.
That’s why I will continue to say:
Having Amnesia can sometimes be the best thing to happen to someone.
I agree with this, especially as someone who has difficulty forgiving. I’d suggest rewording this sentence, “Us fighting became so normal that us being on good terms felt like the world had been flipped upside down.” It reads a bit awkwardly.
Kelli-Rae, you’ve presented a strong argument for how resentment can harm. Nonetheless, although you included a link to a page about dissociative amnesia, which I do appreciate, I wish you included more information about the symptoms you and your mother experienced. This would help readers understand the condition better and could be helpful for those who may be experiencing similar symptoms, because you know, we are all traumatised XD.
This piece beautifully captures the transformative power of forgetting past traumas through Dissociative Amnesia. The personal story adds depth, and the message about the liberating nature of forgiveness is poignant.
This is quite a lovely piece, Kelli-Rae. It was totally relatable as well, due to some experiences that I shared in the past with my Mom. I appreciate your openness and I am elated that you have a better bond with your Mom now due to dissociative amnesia. Also, I love that quote that you inserted by Nelson Mandela, it really tied everything together.
Sylvia Wynter's Dream 
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