Sylvia Wynter's Dream

written by Dominic Ramsay

Trigger Warning: Depression, Anxiety, Mental Illness

So recently I have been attending therapy sessions to combat my depression and anxiety. In general it’s been difficult to process my emotions however one thing that my therapist suggested to me was to make a thought record to help make sense of my emotions.

This too, along with regular therapy has been quite difficult. Part of my issue is that in addressing my mental health, my emotions tend to linger in my mind making the healing process harm more than help.

This could be because I’m too attached to my feelings, it’s too personal, too close, too real. However, there is an idea I had which could ease the process a bit.

Enter: A.I Art

Artificial intelligence has made great strides in the past few years and one of the more recent interesting developments is the now publicly available A.I generated art website: Nightcafe

How does A.I art help you with mental health? I hear you asking.

Well, my theory is that if I am able to run my thought records through the art generator then I can start viewing these emotions as separate from myself. Maybe then it will become easier to part with these feelings and actually begin to feel the healing that I’m trying to achieve.

At the very least some pretty pictures might come of it.

So below are 5 of my thought record entries run through the A.I art generator.

Oct 8 2022,

Situation: In the bathroom about to shower

Thoughts: I need to start my work soon.

Emotions: Anxious, Nervous, Energetic

Behaviours: going to shower then start working

Oct 9, 2022,

Situation: laying on my back dozing off to sleep

Thoughts: I have two very important work obligations directly facing me and even more work after it.

Emotions: Stressed, Anxious

Behaviours: Laying on my back, procrastinating starting work.

Oct 10, 2022

Situation: Sitting by my laptop procrastinating a test.

Thoughts: i am worried about the tyre I punctured driving home earlier

Emotions: Numb, vacant

Behaviours: Sitting and procrastinating work.

Oct 17, 2022

Situation: Dropping my best friend home after a day of hanging out.

Thoughts: I did not have as much fun a time as I would have liked. I think we’ve drifted apart.

Emotions: mild sadness. Numbness

Behaviours: driving back home

Oct 19, 2022

Situation: Getting ready for bed

Thoughts: It seems very hard for me to feel anything positive.

Emotions: mild Irritation, mild shame, mild sadness

Behaviours: Going to bed

I encourage you to try this out for yourself and see what your emotions look like